its funny... ok, not really

you struggle and struggle to drag yourself out of the ratrace pit, you try so hard for months.. years even. scratching and clawing, then just when it seems you are at the bitter edge... something gives and you fall... straight back into the same exact dark place you just crawled out of. why does it always happen? is there really such a thing as cursed? am I really? why cannot I not see something different, some actual progress? why must I always fall straight back into the same exact space?

what must I do to avoid falling into the same spot? how do i change the outcome? what am I doing wrong?

I'm getting tired of seeing the same-o everytime. I need a change badly. I have given up sooo much already. I even tire of the sad state of me at times like this. it isn't much wonder I've grown rather bitter and cynacle. its the same thing again, only without my buddy... my poor sweet meow is gone.

and Where's my Silver Platter?!!!