Random Specialness

This was a special find to me, both for being one of my favorite christmas songs, and also for being JD singing, of all places, at the Vatican. His words at the end of the video were short but certainly with good indication of a central belief. John, you traveled in so many different directions looking for a bit of that peace you always seemed to sing of... perhaps you have found it, true peace, at last.

Valentines Doldrums

Wow, i'm actually posting on a holiday of sorts..on the holiday too, not before or more likely sometime after it... which is typical of me.
Today, I'm am feeling down..a little irritated or agitated, and sad. I'm not totally sure why.. it usually happens when I am feeling overwhelmed by something. that that doesn't have to actually be the case either.. I just feel it.. and it gets me down.
So here I am posting on this thing. what do you think? should I rant about all of life's woes, or cry in my tea or something? I guess I could.. don't think its ever made me feel much better though.
I suppose I'll just have to ride it out as I have before until something of interest distracts me and off I go once more.
Contrary to the color of my past, I don't find my life very interesting most times. I try to not let it get to me though.

I just need to find something that engages my brain, like a thinking game or something fun. Something thats worth the escape from dull reality for a little while. Rping has always been good fun, especially if there's a bit of character personals wound around an engaging plot. now, if only I could find a group of rpers/writers on the web that knows what I am actually speaking of. lol!
oh, and for those sewer-dwellers out there: no, I am speaking mainly 'romance-ish' stuff within a plot of action, not whatever details -you- might be thinking. lol!

Anyway, hope I find something interesting soon. I don't like feeling this way.. all at odds and ends. It doesn't suit me.

Hope you all have a wonderful St. valentine's... and do be sure to at least give a hug to your pals and let them know you care about them. Its worth the efort.

Perchance to Dream

This is the retelling of a strange dream I had. somehow, I think it could make a good plot for a roleplay game. I told this to a friend of mine (typos and all) and this is how it went.

*****
I was 3rd person observer. there was a noble family.. this apparently was slightly in the past, i think.
the older brother contracted lycanthropy.
the father, for some reason, had the brother locked up in a cell they made for him.
but he would still get out once in awhile. and would get his younger brother to go play in the woods.
because they were not sure where.. or from whom the disease had come from. they tried to forbid the younger brother to go running off to play.. especially in the woods.
but the older would still come get him out of his room to go play.
but the older brother had issues.. there were times he couldn't seem to help himself, and he would lash out.
and it frightened the younger brother.
then one day, the uncle, visiting, i think, mentioned to the younger bro, that he knew the older brother was getting out through an unused fireplace.
the younger then saw him do it.. the older brother would get out and go sneaking off, not always to the younger bro's room.. but to the kitchen
kitchen
there, he would..spit in a basin of something that resembled milk.. but was probably water and flour or something.
but none knew about that.

then, the younger brother, in some fright discovered that the uncle was telling the truth.
he had the passage in the fireplace bricked up
...something about the father.. he would always say the words, tell will tell, or time will out. this seriously annoyed the younger bro for some reason.

the father was this straight-laced noble man.. and didn't enjoy knowing he had a dirty family secret. and was always trying hard to keep everyone in line about keeping the secret a family secret.
anyway..
the older bro was really angry to discover that not only was his escape from the cage bricked up, but that his own dear brother was responsible for it.
time passed.. weeks..months, i think

then one day... a young cousin.. they were visiting, i think, the family...he and he mom.
it wasn't just a wall. the whole passage was bricked over.
this young kid.. must have been about 5 or so..
contracted lycanthropy... from having eaten something that contained the older brothers spit.
this put the whole house in an uproar. they didn't know quite what to do.

they couldn't put the youngster in the case with the brother, because he'd simply be torn apart.

i don't know. the kid was a bit spoiled.. he must have eaten something none else would in the house?
well.. they didn't have the will to build the 5 year old a cage to keep him in.
they thought, perhaps they would have to have him guillotined..


but the father was dragging his heels on making a decision.
the kid was fine but for occasional bouts of trying to bite.. but it was still fairly controllable.
the older brother heard of it and said, ohno! you can't kill the poor lad. he's an innocent!
then he'd turn a bit and snicker under his breath.
i got the impression that the older brother was -trying- to make things bad for the father.
Gee, you think, after he was locked up for so long. lol
i thought it might be because he didn't appreciate the way the father was treating him.
but looking at it from the father's pov... the father loved his family. even the older brother, who was his heir

perhaps he had him caged because he couldn't bare the thought of killing him.
but the older brother didn't see it like that at all.
anyway.. that was about the story of my dream. it was a lot of detail and followed along in an un-scattered fashion.
*****

Another Possible Theme Song

Will this be the next theme song for a love lost? It might just be if something isn't done fairly soon.

What Hurts The Most
by Rascal Flatts

I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house
That don’t bother me
I can take a few tears now and then and just let them out
I’m not afraid to cry every once in a while
Even though going on with you gone still upsets me
There are days every now and again I pretend I’m ok
But that’s not what gets me

What hurts the most
Was being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was tryin’ to do

It’s hard to deal with the pain of losing you everywhere I go
But I’m doin’ It
It’s hard to force that smile when I see our old friends and I’m alone
Still Harder
Getting up, getting dressed, livin’ with this regret
But I know if I could do it over

I would trade give away all the words that I saved in my heart
That I left unspoken

What hurts the most
Is being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was trying to do

What hurts the most
Is being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was trying to do

Not seeing that loving you
That’s what I was trying to do

Reintro and Yet Another World.

I was informed that it's been a while since putting anything here and I should.. so here goes. *turns Ramble switch to *on*

Hey there! My name is sunny-elf ..yeah I know, strange name but.. thats the way it goes sometimes. Before I spent time in Dereth, which you may have heard of..or maybe not, I was brought up in another world. Now, I know what you are thinking.. you are thinking that either I am a wonderful yarn-spinner, or somehow I have managed to have a jam-packed adventurous life thus far. Either or both of those could possibly be correct. *grin* Think I'll just leave it up to you to figure which is for-sure fact, and which is just wishful thinking, ok?

Anyway.. you ever get told something.. and you spend so much time believing it was just as you knew...only to find out there's so much more to it and then you spend quite some time just trying to wrap your brain around the new facts?
Well the fact is, there are places, all around the world, even now, where there are little nests of communities where time seems to have slowed down..if not gone a bit backward. It's true. you see them here and there.. like ghost towns, only living. I spent my first several years in such a place. My world was quite a bit smaller then I took it for, apparently, because when I finally saw some of the rest of the world I actually lived in, I was completely blown away. (also known as a terrible case of culture shock.)

The little place I spent those first years in, were, for lack of a better description, in the great wilds of the 'back-woods' north country.
It seems, that while the rest of the world was rocking to tune of dead stones, We were still hopping to the beat of shaved fish in blue shoes. While the rest of the world was learning the tech of computers, we were lucky to have a tv.. one tv.. in the living room, that actually got color channels. While the rest of the world was watching law and order.. we were watching Hee Haw. (hows that for lawful order?! lol) I guess you could say we were a bit behind the times. so if my language sounds a bit ..dated.. that would be why.
I know it's a little hard to believe, especially if you live in today's world(read: big cities). Seriously, We didn't have micro's.. or xboxes.. or even working dryers half the time.

I am, as I once said, the youngest of a fair number of kids, the nearest to me, is my elder by at least 5 years. (I wasn't exactly expected, so I understand "...born on the way.") My mom was a hard-working German lady with close-minded folks. and my dad was a stern and stubbren Scotsman who worked on the roads. We were a bit superstitious, A bit of the bully, and usually found tom-boying about in the miles of forest we called 'our territory' or curled up somewhere, reading an old book, or snitched comic. (It's where I learned to love the dictionary, by the way. :) I was adept with words and spelling before I had even started school. (no, we didn't have a one-room wooden schoolhouse.. although I think there was one in the area of a cabin we first lived in.)

When I was still far too young, my mom died. and as she was the glue that kept us together.. we split up much like a bursting star, and took off for other parts. sometimes, we would come back together.. one or two of us at a time.. but then we were off again just as quickly as ever, learning the traveling gypsy way.

I have had to learn a few things in order to get along in all this moving about. One thing I have learned is.. from about the age of 4 to 104 everyone has at least one story to tell. and oftentimes.. there is wisdom to be found in them. I also learned the value of friendship. Some friends, can be as close as family and are at least as important as such to me, maybe more so.